Realizations After Staring at the Computer Screen for Five Minutes

I was looking at the youtube window of the "Just a Dream" Remix by Jason Chen and Joseph Vincent [see previous posts]. There was something about it that made me happy. (And no, it was not the guys.) I was wondering if I wanted to tweet the post to further support them; was it tweet-worthy? Well, yes, I thought. It's a good song and they're great singers. But then I realized there was another reason I wanted to share it. It was because they were Asian artists. But my thoughts didn't just stop there; it wasn't just because they were Asian artists.

Last night I was looking at Jason Chen's youtube profile and I saw that he was in UCLA studying business and planning to be an auditor. And looking through his videos I joked with Lisa how he was such the stereotypical Asian, with trophies lining the cabinets of his house in the background and how he could play multiple musical instruments. Lisa commented how his house looked very nice and I was thinking, figures...Asian parents and financial stability. My thoughts wandered farther to how we're all just trying to reach that American dream as well. One of a financially-secure job so we can get that nice house and support our families. However, is that American dream also one that ties us down and holds us back from our dreams?

I realized, in some way, maybe I feel connected to these people because we're all doing and struggling with the same thing. Are we torn between obligation and desire?

I don't know Jason Chen, so I can't say for sure that what I'm about to say about him and his parents are true. But when I look at Jason the image I get of him is that of a talented Asian singer who's passionate about music, and going into business to be financially stable so his parents will be happy. Again, maybe that's not his actual situation. But maybe that's the way my mind is interpreting it.

Recently I've been wondering about how much of what I do is out of passion and how much of what I do is out of obligation. Even if Jason Chen's situation is not how I picture it, I still know many other people, especially in the Asian population, that struggle with what they want to do with their life and what their parents want them to do with their life. Their dreams and desires conflict with the morals and values instilled in them by their parents. For example, I hear stories of pastors who went through law school or med school and got their degrees only to make their parents happy because then the son/daughter would have "something to fall back on," and their parents could say "my son/daughter is a lawyer/doctor" (even though he or she is actually working in a church). Then there's also all the other stories of talented (Asian) singers, artists, writers, etc. out there who are not studying their passions, but business, medicine, or something else instead. Have we accepted these alternate studies to be our lesser passions? Are we all in denial of our "true selves" (is there even such a thing)? Or maybe it is more wise to be practical in our thinking. Yet how come some part of me rejoices when I see some Asian artist pursuing their dreams against their parents' wishes?

So many questions.... Guess I should figure out what I want to do first....