I just asked Lisa how it's been in NYC. And then she replied that I've only been gone for 4 days.... Wow, it does not feel like it's been four days; feels like it been at least a week, or maybe even two. So much has happened in these last four days. Orientation information sessions, dorm stuff, scheduling, exploring, etc.; it's all been non-stop. I'm so tired....
While I haven't been as outgoing as I would like to be, I'm getting to know people nevertheless. It's a little more comforting to be in a diverse class (BMC's most diverse class ever in fact: http://news.brynmawr.edu/?p=3280), but I found out today how truly diverse BMC is. So today was community day in terms of orientation where we did activities to learn more about our community. In addition to having students coming from all over the U.S. as well as the world, I learned how we all came from different backgrounds, in terms of passions, interests, types of families, etc. I don't really know how to explain it but today we were given 10 minutes in our customs groups to write a poem titled "I Am From..." I wish I could type up some of the ones I heard from my classmates but as I cannot remember their poems, I will share mine instead. (Please keep in mind I only had 10 minutes to write this.)
I Am From...
Dreams of a more promising future across the Atlantic,
a past built on below-minimum wage jobs and persistence.
A home where feelings are shameful and love is unsaid,
and "When we were young and poor..." began every sentence.
I Am From...
Quiet surburbia,
where success equals money instead of self-discovery.
Cities that never sleep,
paved sidewalks, hot dog vendors, car exhaust, skyscrapers, and namebrands.
I Am From...
A family united through their Savior's blood.
A generation ever-changing, ever-growing, but never forgetting their past.
A college filled with passionate, intelligent, and virtuous women.
I loved this activity. It really gave me a chance to learn more about my classmates, their backgrounds, interests, passions, families, dreams, and values. While I knew that there were definitely some intelligent, passioned women at BMC, through this activity I saw how every woman at BMC was an intelligent, passioned, virtuous, ambitious woman. Then this was followed by a presentation on the BMC alumni network and achievements of BMC alumna. And to top it, I just finished watching Disney's Mulan with my dormmates in the common room over dinner. (A girl finding herself and discovering her true worth? Sounds like a BMC woman.) So all in all, I couldn't be more proud of being a part of the BMC nest at the moment.
Monday is Convocation and the first day of classes! Bryn Mawr College - Class of 2013!
Saturday, August 29, 2009
Friday, August 21, 2009
College
So I leave for Bryn Mawr College for the first time in 4 days... on August 26th. Today I found out that the schedule for Customs Week came out and that my Freshman Emily Bach Seminar is "Drugs, Brain, and Culture." And I have yet to start packing, finish shopping, complete my wish list for classes, take my placement test(s), and complete financial aid and health insurance stuff. Everything seems to be happening lighting fast...and I seem to be stagnant.
People keep asking me how I feel about leaving for college - excited? Honestly, I simply don't know. Part of me wants to start anew and be independent. The other part of me doesn't think I'm ready. I don't want to drag my issues to Philly with me.
Seeking strength and guidance.
People keep asking me how I feel about leaving for college - excited? Honestly, I simply don't know. Part of me wants to start anew and be independent. The other part of me doesn't think I'm ready. I don't want to drag my issues to Philly with me.
Seeking strength and guidance.
Thursday, August 20, 2009
Talking with Deborah tonight about counseling, psychology, psychiatry...
"It's never only one person who is dysfunctional in the family. It's the whole family as a unit that is dysfunctional."
Is it the same with the family of Christ? Does the church need counseling? (Is that what Sunday sermons are for?)
"It's never only one person who is dysfunctional in the family. It's the whole family as a unit that is dysfunctional."
Is it the same with the family of Christ? Does the church need counseling? (Is that what Sunday sermons are for?)
Monday, August 10, 2009
Hello, I'm in pursuit of...Humility
That was what my Boon Church Coffeehouse nametag said. (Well actually at first I said "humbleness" but then Stanley pointed out that 'humbleness' wasn't actually a word. Note to self: Do not become a writer, you'll become a bum.)
Anyways, while I'm reluctant to admit it, I was actually thinking about what to write on that "nametag" for a while. My first thought was to write 'true love', but then I thought that was cliché. Then was going to write 'happyness' because it related to Dan's message that he was giving that night, but that would've been even more cliché. So after thinking some more about my current condition and what I really desire...to grow in spiritual maturity... I finally admitted that I needed to be more humble. (I began to discern that all my recent failures and problems have been the result of lack of care for others and being inconsiderate of others.)
Looking back at my past entries, all the posts have been pretty selfish. As I recently subscribed to Pastor Eugene Hor's blog, Mark Driscoll's Blog, and John Piper's fan page on Facebook, I see what they post compared to what I post and I can't help but mentally smack myself for constantly thinking of myself. It's been really encouraging to read their posts about their church as well as the nation-wide church, and the global church. Having dug myself so deep into my hole, I don't think I can fully comprehended the amazing work He's doing in the U.S. and in the world at this time; instead the posts that hit closest to home are those about their churches. As the time approaches when I leave NYC for college, thoughts about Boon Church and my relationships with my friends, as well as my expectations for my college fellowship(s)/church have been bombarding my mind. What do I picture when I envision the ideal church? A phrase from one of Reverend Don's past sermons pops into my head..."to be with people I love, that love each other, and that love me." A church characterized by love...selflessness and not selfishness. My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends. You are my friends if you do what I command. (John 15:12-14)
And I think in light of recent sermons (by Dan Shih and Pastor Scott) from Colossians 3 I think I know what I should do... "Since, then, you have been raised with Christ, set your hearts on things above, where Christ is seated at the right hand of God. Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things. For you died, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God. [...] since you have taken off your old self with its practices and have put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge in the image of its Creator. Here there is no Greek or Jew, circumcised or uncircumcised, barbarian, Scythian, slave or free, but Christ is all, and is in all. Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity. Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful. Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom, and as you sing psalms, hymns and spiritual songs with gratitude in your hearts to God. And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him." (Col. 3:1-3, 9-17)
While I knew these verses before, I truly needed God to show me up before I was able to (once again) put aside my pride and surrender humbly to His Word and trust in His plan.
The first lesson was Boon Church's 2009 Coffeehouse. I hadn't remembered inviting any friends but apparently I had invited people when the Facebook invite first came out. I was going to Coffeehouse not expecting to see any friends so I was really suprised when I saw two friends show up, one of which would rarely be at a church event but showed up because of another friend, and the other had just decided to come out of nowhere. Under the impression that non-believers had to be coerced into church events, it was really humbling to see how God doesn't need me. While neither had a so called life-changing experience I am trusting in Him that He is planting seeds.
His second lesson was with a Herald Gospel Camp camper that I had been worried about. As her previous counselor and one of the people she had confided in before, I felt such a pressure to help her when I heard some troubling news. Going up to visit camp the other day I felt so confident that once I saw her face-to-face that she had to talk to me and would stop avoiding me, but I was so wrong. It was quite disappointing that night when I headed back down after hearing about her unwillingness to open up and without having her say a single sentence to me other than "Leave me alone!" The feeling of failure hung on my shoulders. Thus when I received an email that she had opened up later on, it was truly a joyous occasion.
These lessons in humility have truly shown me that everything is in His Hands. Looking back I'm glad I wasn't able to accomplish much lately so that I know it's not by my own merit so I can boast, but by His hands so I can praise Him.
Praise Him, for He is Good.
Anyways, while I'm reluctant to admit it, I was actually thinking about what to write on that "nametag" for a while. My first thought was to write 'true love', but then I thought that was cliché. Then was going to write 'happyness' because it related to Dan's message that he was giving that night, but that would've been even more cliché. So after thinking some more about my current condition and what I really desire...to grow in spiritual maturity... I finally admitted that I needed to be more humble. (I began to discern that all my recent failures and problems have been the result of lack of care for others and being inconsiderate of others.)
Looking back at my past entries, all the posts have been pretty selfish. As I recently subscribed to Pastor Eugene Hor's blog, Mark Driscoll's Blog, and John Piper's fan page on Facebook, I see what they post compared to what I post and I can't help but mentally smack myself for constantly thinking of myself. It's been really encouraging to read their posts about their church as well as the nation-wide church, and the global church. Having dug myself so deep into my hole, I don't think I can fully comprehended the amazing work He's doing in the U.S. and in the world at this time; instead the posts that hit closest to home are those about their churches. As the time approaches when I leave NYC for college, thoughts about Boon Church and my relationships with my friends, as well as my expectations for my college fellowship(s)/church have been bombarding my mind. What do I picture when I envision the ideal church? A phrase from one of Reverend Don's past sermons pops into my head..."to be with people I love, that love each other, and that love me." A church characterized by love...selflessness and not selfishness. My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends. You are my friends if you do what I command. (John 15:12-14)
And I think in light of recent sermons (by Dan Shih and Pastor Scott) from Colossians 3 I think I know what I should do... "Since, then, you have been raised with Christ, set your hearts on things above, where Christ is seated at the right hand of God. Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things. For you died, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God. [...] since you have taken off your old self with its practices and have put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge in the image of its Creator. Here there is no Greek or Jew, circumcised or uncircumcised, barbarian, Scythian, slave or free, but Christ is all, and is in all. Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity. Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful. Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom, and as you sing psalms, hymns and spiritual songs with gratitude in your hearts to God. And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him." (Col. 3:1-3, 9-17)
While I knew these verses before, I truly needed God to show me up before I was able to (once again) put aside my pride and surrender humbly to His Word and trust in His plan.
The first lesson was Boon Church's 2009 Coffeehouse. I hadn't remembered inviting any friends but apparently I had invited people when the Facebook invite first came out. I was going to Coffeehouse not expecting to see any friends so I was really suprised when I saw two friends show up, one of which would rarely be at a church event but showed up because of another friend, and the other had just decided to come out of nowhere. Under the impression that non-believers had to be coerced into church events, it was really humbling to see how God doesn't need me. While neither had a so called life-changing experience I am trusting in Him that He is planting seeds.
His second lesson was with a Herald Gospel Camp camper that I had been worried about. As her previous counselor and one of the people she had confided in before, I felt such a pressure to help her when I heard some troubling news. Going up to visit camp the other day I felt so confident that once I saw her face-to-face that she had to talk to me and would stop avoiding me, but I was so wrong. It was quite disappointing that night when I headed back down after hearing about her unwillingness to open up and without having her say a single sentence to me other than "Leave me alone!" The feeling of failure hung on my shoulders. Thus when I received an email that she had opened up later on, it was truly a joyous occasion.
These lessons in humility have truly shown me that everything is in His Hands. Looking back I'm glad I wasn't able to accomplish much lately so that I know it's not by my own merit so I can boast, but by His hands so I can praise Him.
Praise Him, for He is Good.
Thursday, August 6, 2009
Service and Repair
Lately, a lot of things have seemed to go wrong. I can't shake this feeling of discontent. Problems are cluttering my life. Prayers have felt unanswered. "Friends" have disappeared. Now I remember why I never opened up before, because it's been nothing but backstabbing and abandonment. My temper is getting shorter and my patience is running thin.
I've realized that's why I've been so eagar to head off to college because it's suppose to mean a brand new start. But in my current condition, that probably won't be the case; I can see myself dragging all my issues to Philly as well.
"I needed a day like this."
"Service and repair."
- One Tree Hill
I need a day of service and repair....
I've realized that's why I've been so eagar to head off to college because it's suppose to mean a brand new start. But in my current condition, that probably won't be the case; I can see myself dragging all my issues to Philly as well.
"I needed a day like this."
"Service and repair."
- One Tree Hill
I need a day of service and repair....
Monday, August 3, 2009
Philippians 4:1,4-9
1Therefore, my brothers, you whom I love and long for, my joy and crown, that is how you should stand firm in the Lord, dear friends!
4Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! 5Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. 6Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
8Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. 9Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you.
4Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! 5Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. 6Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
8Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. 9Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you.
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)